Lyrics:
First verse
""Don't believe a thing you hear, nor half of what you see"" Mother always said to me. When I was a kid of three. Now I know that she was right Right in ev'ry way. In the papers ev'ryday Here's what the head lines say.First
Chorus
Chorus girls are darn good cooks. That's a lot of bunk. And they love to read good books. That's a lot of bunk. Two girls took two boys in their car. When they got out pretty far, the boys said ""Stop or we'll tell Ma,"" That's a lot of bunk. Father get the hammer, there's a fly on baby's head Chorus girls are darn good cooks. That's a lot of bunk. And they love to read good books. That's a lot of bunk. Two girls took two boys in their car. When they got out pretty far, the boys said ""Stop or we'll tell Ma,"" That's a lot of bunk. Father get the hammer, there's a fly on baby's head
Second verse
This fool song has got no sense, when all is said and done But I think it’s lots of fun. And I’ve only just begun. Now I hope the audience won’t think I’m a bore. And I hope they won’t get sore, ‘Cause I’m gonna sing some more.
Second chorus
Taxi drivers never cheat. That’s a lot of bunk. Cops are always on their beat. That’s a lot of bunk. I took a show girl out with me. Dined at Cafe de Paris, she said “I’ll just have cake and tea.” That’s a lot of bunk. She knocked my apartment, and so I knocked her flat. Taxi drivers never cheat. That’s a lot of bunk. Cops are always on their beat. That’s a lot of bunk. I took a show girl out with me. Dined at Cafe de Paris, she said “I’ll just have cake and tea.” That’s a lot of bunk. She knocked my apartment, and so I knocked her flat.
Extra Choruses:
Third chorus
Waiters never take a tip That’s a lot of bunk. Car conductors never gyp That’s a lot of bunk. Why only just the other day I ‘phoned two thousand miles, and say I got my number right away That’s a lot of bunk. Was engaged to a girl with a wooden leg But I broke it off.
Fourth chorus
My landlord’s a poor old gent That’s a lot of bunk. And he’s never raised the rent That’s a lot of bunk. The cats in all the yards, Oh! my They sing so sweet, they sing so high I love to hear their lullaby That’s a lot of bunk. We got a goat without any nose But gosh how he can smell.
Fifth chorus
Everybody loves to die That’s a lot of bunk. Little babies never cry That’s a lot of bunk. I met a tramp whose funds were low I listened to his tale of woe And said “Poor man take all my dough” That’s a lot of bunk. Throw a sponge in water, then you’ll see something swell.
Sixth chorus
Actors lead an awful life That’s a lot of bunk. Every man’s true to his wife That’s a lot of bunk. The soldiers fought for you and me They fought for our liberty They’ll get their bonus wait and see That’s a lot of bunk. Automobiles come from China, because they go “Hong Kong”
